Have you ever wondered what the power of your words has on others especially your children?
Back in 2013 when I was just starting out as a coach. I wrote and ran a two-day workshop for young girls. All these girls were around 9-11 years old.
We all sat in a circle, and I asked this question...
“ What does confidence mean to you? ” I received a multitude of answers from “being able to speak up, looking people in the eyes when you speak to them, standing up straight etc”.
As I went around the circle I got to the last little girl. She had her head down.
I asked her “what do you think confidence means?” The first thing that came out her mouth was “I don`t know, people tell me I look like my mum, that means I am ugly.”
This was so hard to hear from a 10-year-old girl.
I said “ why would you think that? ”
She went on to tell me, everyone says I look like my mum. I hear my mum in the bathroom when she is getting ready saying “Look at you, you look disgusting. Better put some makeup on to cover that ugly face”.
Now I had met her Mum that morning and to hear this really shocked me. Her mum was a very stylish, she was stunning.
Now this must have been something that sadly her Mum said to herself on a regular basis for this little girl to take this belief on board. She felt so strongly about it that she had to share it with someone she just met.
Everyone is guilty at some stage for out loud negative self-talk. The problem here especially if you are a parent you just don`t know when your children are listening.
If you say...
I`m so fat, you look like (fill in the blank). I`m not this, I`m not that. I`m so tired, you can`t even fit into your clothes, who would want to love you etc. This is the power of your words. Your word then become their words.
Negative self-talk always has a root cause.
Where did it come from in the first place. If this is you and you need support I`m here to help.
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